CamDevo

When old folks get together the subject of physical ailments usually comes up. Back aches, bad knees, planned surgeries, cancers, remissions, and medications. All are discussed to the point that it seems a bit like bragging. Who has the worst problem? Who’s in the worst pain?

It’s not a contest I want to win.

I’ve been through a lot physically as well. I’m not even an old-timer yet. But even in middle age, I know now that what doesn’t kill me does indeed make me stronger. Maybe not physically, but emotionally and spiritually.

“And not only that, but we also boast in our afflictions, because we know that affliction produces endurance, endurance produces proven character, and proven character produces hope. This hope will not disappoint us, because God’s love has been poured out in our hearts through the Holy Spirit who was given to us.” (Romans‬ ‭5‬:‭3‬-‭5,‬ ‭CSB)‬‬

I was really shaken when I was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis. But God provided and continues to provide what I need to deal with that condition. So, when I was diagnosed six years later with breast cancer, I had hope. I knew God, who never changes, still loved me and would provide again. He did. Two years after that when I was diagnosed with a brain tumor, my hope was even more solid.

No one wants pain in their life, but unfortunately, it’s going to visit everyone. It’s a fact of being mortal in this fallen world. However, because of God’s love I can be sure of coming out the other side with a deeper knowledge of who He is and how much He loves me.

Dear God,

Thank you for showing how faithful you are through all my physical ailments, big and small. I know you are always with me and your perfect plan cannot be thwarted. Teach me to continue to trust you and put my hope in you no matter how things appear.

The day my sister died, she had been texting me about some difficulty she was having breathing due to fluid in her lungs. She was wondering whether to go to the hospital. I texted her that the hospital would probably hook her up to a ventilator, but they wouldn’t be able to do anything about her cancer. Did she want to be stuck in a hospital?

I regret that text.

But I can’t go back in time and advise her to go to the hospital, to eke out some more time.

I’ve had many moments in my life that I wish I could do over and do better, or at least do differently. I bet most of us have.

When I said or did the wrong thing and hurt someone else or just looked like an insensitive dolt, I wanted to go back in time and say something else, or better yet, say nothing.

“Therefore repent and turn back, so that your sins may be wiped out,” (Acts‬ ‭3‬:‭19,‬ ‭CSB)‬‬

God is so gracious that He does let me turn back time on my sin. Every time I screw up, He gives me another chance to do better, if I ask for it. A clean slate. A fresh start. I just wish I didn’t need so many fresh starts.

Dear God,

Thank you so much for your generous forgiveness and your patience with me. I’m sorry I sin so often. I want to do better. Teach me your ways so I can be better and better until one day, when you return, I will be made perfect like you with no more need to turn back.

I’m a worrier. It’s not good. In fact, it is a sin because it means I don’t trust God but am leaning on my own strength and understanding instead — which I obviously don’t trust either.

How do I stop worrying?

The Bible has a whole section labeled “The Cure For Anxiety” (Matthew 6:25-34, CSB.) The gist of that section is that I worry, in part, because my priorities are misplaced. God has given me exactly two jobs to “worry” about: loving Him and loving others. That’s it.

According to Jesus, God’s kingdom rests in those two commands. If I spend my time putting those two things first, He promises to take care of everything else.

“But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be provided for you.” (Matthew‬ ‭6‬:‭33,‬ ‭CSB)‬‬

Instead of worrying about getting to an appointment on time, I should worry about my husband who is driving. Loving him would mean not nagging him to drive faster or take a different route. God will take care of the appointment when I focus on love.

When I’m anxious, it’s because my priorities are upside-down from God’s kingdom. And I’m not trusting God with the rest.

Dear God,

Help me to recognize my misplaced priorities and make the right adjustments. Show me where I need to love instead of worry. Forgive me for worrying. I trust you. Thank you for your beautiful promise to supply everything else.

It’s human nature to try to shirk apologies. An easy example can be found with kids on the playground. When asked to apologize to another child they have hurt, most children will begin rationalizing. Then they will blame the victim or the circumstances or the wind direction — anything else. Finally, reluctantly, an insincere apology may be muttered.

We adults aren’t much better. We avoid apologies at all cost because even the semblance of an apology means accepting all the blame, facing our flaws. We act like children in our marriages, our friendships, politics, at work, and even with God. We rationalize and look for someone or something else to blame.

God won’t put up with it forever.

“Even now — this is the Lord’s declaration — turn to me with all your heart, with fasting, weeping, and mourning. Tear your hearts, not just your clothes, and return to the Lord your God. For he is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger, abounding in faithful love, and he relents from sending disaster.” (Joel‬ ‭2‬:‭12‬-‭13‬, ‭CSB‬‬)

God knows what is in my heart. He knows everything that I have to apologize for. He knows exactly who to blame and why.

But even so, no matter what I’ve done, all He wants is a sincere apology. It’s not hard. Really. It’s simple. I’m just so proud, so reluctant, too ashamed to admit my mistakes….

Dear God,

I am truly sorry.

Giving in to temptation is a decision. I don’t control when or how temptation arrives, but I do control what I do about it. I have a choice. I can choose to give in or not to give in.

It may not feel like much of a choice. It may feel more like a need, but by definition a temptation is not something I need, it’s something I want but am wary of for some reason. I’m not tempted to breathe; I must breathe to live and do so willingly, without shame. However, telling a juicy secret about someone may tempt me.

That moment of decision seems very small. Tiny, in fact. Like a flimsy little barrier that I’m holding up with one hand while piling on excuses and rationalizations with the other. The wall strains, but holds. Until suddenly, I simply take my holding hand away. I’ve decided to give in. I want to blame the piling-on hand or external forces, but the fault lies in my decision to remove my barrier-holding hand.

“No temptation has come upon you except what is common to humanity. But God is faithful; he will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation he will also provide the way out so that you may be able to bear it.” (1 Corinthians‬ ‭10‬:‭13,‬ ‭CSB)‬‬

It may not feel like it, but my barrier-holding hand is strong enough. It’s strong enough because God is helping me hold it. He guarantees that I am strong enough to withstand any temptation that comes my way.

But the decision still lies with me. Even with God helping me hold my barrier against temptation, I can choose to remove it. I can choose to give in. He allows my freedom to choose, even when my choices are self-destructive or hurtful, even when He knows the pain it will cause.

I want to choose well today.

Dear God,

Thank you for providing the means to withstand all the temptations to do evil that come my way, either from within or without. Teach me to trust your power and to keep choosing to fight. Please forgive me when I decide to fail. I want to choose righteousness.

Many times in my marriage, when one of us was having a tough time, the other came up with the strength to carry us both for a while. So far, we haven’t had a time when we were both at the end of our ropes at the same time. It is a beautiful thing when it works out this way because we all need someone we can depend on from time to time.

But what about when it doesn’t? What if the person you thought you could depend on lets you down? They said they would call, but the phone doesn’t ring. They said they would meet you, but they don’t show up. They promised not to do something but did it anyway.

“Have mercy on those who waver;” ‭‭(Jude‬ ‭1‬:‭22,‬ ‭CSB)

Sadly, despite my best efforts, I let people down all the time. I’m far from perfect. No one is perfect, in fact.

Except Jesus.

Fortunately Jesus has never and will never let me down. He is always available and always keeps His promises. He listens, encourages, comforts, and always does the right thing.

And He forgives me every time I let Him down. Because of the mercy He has shown me, He asks me to show mercy to others when they let me down.

Dear God,

Thank you so much for your mercy when I fail you. Teach me how to extend that same mercy to others instead of judgment and bitterness. Give me the strength not to waver in my faithfulness and commitment to loving others.

‬‬

My dog, Rocky, is crazy about hunting lizards. Recently we traveled to a place with squirrels, and he discovered a whole new obsession. He was seeing squirrels everywhere. Every leaf that shivered in a breeze was a squirrel. Every noise in the trellis over the patio was a squirrel. He made sure the yard was squirrel-free during our stay.

On a walk through the neighborhood one morning, Rocky was convinced a squirrel was hiding in a short palm tree. I was sure he was wrong as I could see into the palm and saw no squirrel. But Rocky insisted. Suddenly a squirrel started chirping loudly and flew straight up out of the tree and landed on the ground about 15 feet away. Fortunately Rocky’s leash is sturdy. I held tight, and the squirrel scampered away to a different tree, unharmed.

I have learned to trust my dog’s senses more than my own.

“Jesus said, ‘Because you have seen me, you have believed. Blessed are those who have not seen and yet believe.’” (John‬ ‭20‬:‭29‬, ‭CSB‬‬)

The Gospel is full of the eyewitness accounts of Jesus: His ministry, His miracles, His death, and His resurrection. And yet I still want to see for myself.

Videos of implausible events are popular because everyone wants to see for themselves. But even videos are becoming less and less trustworthy with deep fakes and AI.

Without a firsthand account, all I have to rely on is faith. Do I believe those eyewitness reports? Do I believe what the Holy Spirit whispers to me deep in my heart? Do I believe all the many little ways God has shown me that He exists?

If I do, I am blessed.

Dear God,

Thank you for providing the seeds for my faith with the eyewitness reports in the Bible. And thank you for providing the water, fertilizer, and light for those seeds of faith to sprout and grow with your revealed, personal presence throughout my life and with the encouragement of other believers. Forgive my persistent doubts. Help me to weed them out, one by one, every day.

Ok, I am not a fan of our “tipping” economy here in the United States. I hate it, in fact. I know many people disagree with me, and I recognize their points.

For example, some would say I will get better service if my server at a restaurant is anticipating a good tip. I say the restaurant owner should be responsible for the quality of service they provide, since it’s part of what I’m paying for when I eat out. If the service is bad, I won’t eat there again.

The price that is listed should be the price I pay. For everything actually. (Sales tax should also be built in to prices. Why should I have to do math to figure out what something will actually cost me?)

So, I think the cost of a meal at a restaurant should include a fair wage for the staff that presents it to me. All of them. The valet, the host, the server, the dishwasher, the cook, the accountant, whoever. This will make the cost of eating out higher for bad tippers, but as it is, the cost is born by just the generous ones, or those who feel obliged and self-conscious.

“Each person should do as he has decided in his heart — not reluctantly or out of compulsion, since God loves a cheerful giver.” (2 Corinthians‬ ‭9‬:‭7,‬ ‭CSB)‬‬

Perhaps you think I’m just stingy or cheap or selfish. But it’s not that. I give generously and frequently to many charities. And I do it gladly. But a restaurant is not a charity. It is a store. The employer should pay their employees, not me. I want servers to make a reasonable wage, just like every other job should earn a reasonable wage. And in turn, when I purchase something, I should know in advance what the cost will be.

But unless something changes drastically, tipping is here to stay. So I tip. Generously. And I try hard to be cheerful about it.

Dear God,

I am so grateful for all that you have blessed me with. Thank you for this country and the freedom I have to do simple things like eat at a restaurant. Show me how to be generous with the resources you have provided me. Teach me your priorities and forgive me if my priorities don’t line up with yours.

When I have a goal, it’s important to organize my life for success.

For example, let’s say I want to lose weight. To greatly improve my chance of success, I might need to change a few things — besides eating healthier and getting exercise. Maybe I need to change the way I travel home from work because my current route takes me past the delicious smells of my favorite fast food restaurant when I’m hungry and tired.

And maybe I need to get rid of the snack foods I purchased before I set my goal. If they aren’t in my house, they won’t be tempting me every time I look in my cupboard.

And maybe I need to stop watching TV at dinner time since I tend to eat more when I’m distracted by a show and enticed by food commercials.

No matter what I’m trying to avoid in this life, there are many things I can do to help myself succeed. To avoid sin, one of the things I can do is to walk by the Spirit.

“I say, then, walk by the Spirit and you will certainly not carry out the desire of the flesh.” (Galatians‬ ‭5‬:‭16,‬ ‭CSB‬‬)

To walk by the Spirit, I need to arrange my life to spend time with God. I must make time to pray, read and reflect on the Bible, and worship Him. And I have to listen carefully to hear God’s Spirit. He may be telling me I have to adjust some routines, get rid of some habits, and change some patterns. These routines may seem to have nothing to do with sin, but by changing them, avoiding sin will be so much easier.

Dear God,

Thank you for your great advice when it comes to avoiding sin. Remind me to spend time with you, listening to your great advice. Please give me the strength to obey. Forgive me for the times when I ignore your advice in favor of my flesh. I know you love me, and your way is so much better.

There is a trust-building exercise where a blindfolded person is guided across an obstacle course with only the verbal instructions of a sighted partner. The success (and safety) of the effort depends on the communication skills of the guide and the listening skills of the blindfolded person.

As I move through my life, I often feel like I’m navigating an obstacle course. I stumble and trip. I often decide I’ve taken a wrong turn but don’t know how to turn back. I don’t know what other paths are available, and I can’t see what lies ahead on this one.

The reason I am so off-balance and unsure in this world is because of the blindfolding effects of sin. The terrain was rendered unstable and uneven when we chose to strike out on our own path. The devil dug a few ditches, and my own sin contributes to the obstacles.

Fortunately, I have a loving Friend who sees everything clearly — past, present, and future. He sees all the paths that were, are, and could be. And He knows exactly which way is best for me.

“A person’s heart plans his way, but the Lord determines his steps.” (Proverbs‬ ‭16‬:‭9,‬ ‭CSB)‬‬

If I listen to God carefully and constantly, I can navigate any rough patch. I can wade through a deep, boggy mire without being swallowed up, I can traverse a precarious mountain ridge without falling, and I can pass through a dark forest without getting stuck amongst the trees.

One day, my blindfold will be removed, and I will see my smiling Friend who helped me find my way. Until then, I’m listening for His guidance in the dark.

Dear God,

Thank you for staying close and speaking your guiding words to me as I stumble forward in the darkness of this world.