CamDevo

I recently toured the Sunnylands estate, near Palm Springs, California. Sunnylands is the former winter home of wealthy business owner and philanthropist Walter Annenberg. The 220-acre property includes a 9-hole golf course and the Annenbergs’ 25,000 square foot house where they entertained friends, family, celebrities, royalty, presidents and foreign dignitaries.

No one lives in the home now, and although it is kept watered and beautifully groomed, no one uses the golf course either. The estate is a museum and memorial of the Annenbergs’ former way of life. It felt like a shrine to the wealth and power of an era.

Annenberg amassed so much wealth during his life that he was consistently ranked among the top richest individuals in the United States. He gave billions away to education and art institutions, and yet his personal net worth was listed as $4 billion by Forbes when he died in 2002.

But during the tour, I learned that his only son Roger died by suicide. For some reason this shocked me. With all that wealth at his disposal, his life was not all sunshine and roses. Seemingly unlimited wealth, fame, and power could not ward off mental illness and tragedy.

King Solomon was probably the richest man of his time. He could have anything and everything he wanted. But through the book of Ecclesiastes, which he likely wrote, we see that he was ultimately unsatisfied with all this world has to offer. He said everything he saw and experienced was “meaningless.”

Except for one thing.

“Now all has been heard; here is the conclusion of the matter: Fear God and keep his commandments, for this is the duty of all mankind.” (Ecclesiastes‬ ‭12‬:‭13,‬ ‭NIV‬‬)

At the end of his very full and widely experienced life, Solomon concluded that only his relationship with God had any value, purpose, or meaning.

Sure, wealth can provide temporary pleasures and remove many annoyances, but is that enough? The answer is always no. We humans are always wanting more. That is our original sin, and we keep giving in to it. In the Garden, Adam and Eve had almost all of Paradise at their disposal, but they wanted more. They wanted the one thing they were not supposed to have.

This is still the devil’s trap for us today. He whispers that we could have more. More. More. But it’s a trap and a lie.

God is all we need. Only He can truly satisfy my soul. God’s love, peace, joy, and direction is the greatest most valuable gift. If I’m striving harder for something that is not God, I’m wasting my time and energy.

Dear God, thank you for the precious gift of your love. Forgive me for falling for the shiny mirages of wealth, comfort, and luxury. You are all I need and more precious than anything I can ever acquire here. Teach me how to make you my number one priority today.

Discipline has at least two meanings. In one sense discipline is given to me by someone else when I have behaved in an undesirable way. This is typical of a caretaking relationship such as a parent and child, teacher and student, boss and employee, or even law enforcer and citizen. It can be a form of punishment or some kind of retraining activity, like getting a detention for talking in class at school or having to take a safe-driver course when being caught speeding.

In another sense, discipline is something I engage in voluntarily, like when I want to learn a new skill, start a new habit, change an old one, or improve at something I already participate in. For example, running regularly when training for a marathon requires discipline. This kind of discipline may also feel like a type of punishment!

In both cases, discipline comes because change is desired. And change is hard. By avoiding discipline I can avoid pain, but I won’t see any change either.

“No discipline seems enjoyable at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.” (Hebrews‬ ‭12‬:‭11,‬ ‭CSB‬‬)

I don’t have anyone disciplining me anymore. As an independent adult, I can stay out as late as I want, eat whatever I feel like, and be lazy all day. But I’ve realized that way of life leads to its own kind of pain.

If I want energy to function, to enjoy things like playing tennis, and to have healthy and rewarding relationships and experiences, I must discipline myself. It’s hard to choose healthy food, dedicate myself to a regular sleep schedule, work a job, and exercise. But all those things make my life better.

The same is true with my relationship with God. I can ignore Him, put off reading His word, skip meeting with other believers, stop caring about people who need help. But spiritually, I will be stuck. I can’t grow that way. I’ll be missing out on the bounty of peace and joy God wants to give me.

The beautiful thing is that God promises to help me train. He is running right along beside me with encouragement. As long as I take those first few steps toward Him, He will show me the way and give me motivation, inspiration, and results.

Do you want change in your life? Well, you have to start with discipline. One step at a time.

Dear God, thank you for refusing to leave me as I am. I’m so grateful you want to push me to be stronger, to accomplish all that you have for me. Please forgive my stubbornness and teach me how to train to be your good and faithful servant. Thank you for the reminder of how much better my life will be when I do things your way.

I’m not a chef. It’s not really my skillset, nor my interest. But I do enjoy eating, as does my husband, so I cook meals.

Over the years, I have found the part I like the least about cooking is the gathering of ingredients. I don’t mind finding and selecting recipes. And I somewhat enjoy the preparation and actual cooking (sometimes). But analyzing the ingredient list, figuring out what I lack, and slogging over to the grocery store to find and buy stuff is dreadful to me.

Because of this, for many years, we have subscribed to a service that ships the ingredients for a selected number of meals right to my door each week. I choose the meals that appeal to me, and a box arrives with everything I need, in pre-measured amounts. I get all the fun parts of cooking with none of the dread.

“And God is able to make every grace overflow to you, so that in every way, always having everything you need, you may excel in every good work.” (2 Corinthians‬ ‭9‬:‭8,‬ ‭CSB‬‬)

God promises this kind of service in my spiritual life. When I agree to follow His instructions, He promises to provide everything I need to get it done. What a beautiful promise!

Like my meal service, everything God provides is intended for my use in His recipes for loving people. It arrives right when I need it, in exactly the right amount with nothing going to waste. Do I need time? I will have it. Energy? You bet. Money? For sure, it will be there. The right words? That too. It doesn’t arrive early. And it doesn’t arrive late. Always just on time, ready to cook.

But make sure to read and follow the recipe. His word is designed specifically and carefully planned. It does no good for me to use His provisions for other things or to let them sit and spoil. He doesn’t provide blessings just so I can have a comfortable life. He provides them so I can do the work to share them, blessing others.

Dear God, thank you so much for the countless ways you have blessed me. Thank you for the reminder that these blessings are to share. Thank you also for the ways you have met my needs when I have felt empty and incapable. You have proven yourself more than trustworthy in giving me what I need exactly when I need it.

I hate running. But I did it regularly for years. It is a simple way to get great exercise. It doesn’t require much equipment or any other participants. It gets me out into the fresh air of wherever I happen to be. I would run at home and on vacation. I always traveled with my running gear. I only stopped because my knees eventually couldn’t do both running and tennis, and I much prefer tennis.

I hated running because it is hard. It’s work. Picking up and putting down my feet, fighting gravity at the slightest rise in the road, feeling my heart pound and my lungs burn. It’s painful. And it’s tedious. Sometimes there would be new sights to see, but usually, I ran the same route over and over. Music helped, a little. But the tempo had to be just right.

Every time I planned to go for a run, excuses would flood my head. “You can skip today,” my reluctant brain would say. “It’s too cold,” “it’s too hot,” or “it’s raining. That couch looks warm and safe and dry.” Or “let’s wait until your new running shoes arrive.” Or “your playlist isn’t quite right. Let’s stay home and work on that instead.”

I was adept at coming up with reasons not to run, but I found, if I just put on my running clothes, the excuses were so much easier to ignore, and I usually made it out the door.

“Therefore, since we also have such a large cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us lay aside every hindrance and the sin that so easily ensnares us. Let us run with endurance the race that lies before us…” (Hebrews‬ ‭12‬:‭1,‬ ‭CSB‬‬)

God has a plan for me. He has a plan for you too. When He died for me, and I accepted His gift of salvation, that was just the beginning. I have a race to run, a path to tread, a job to do, a purpose for each day — one that He says is good, pleasing, and perfect. (Rom. 12:2)

The devil would love nothing better than for me to ignore that race. He floods my head with excuses. And I provide my own. I distract myself with busyness and say, “maybe tomorrow.”

But you’ll notice today’s verse doesn’t say, throw off those hindrances and sit down. It says to throw them off and run! Get busy with God’s work: worshipping God and loving other people. Actively loving, caring for their needs, seeking their best interests, making their world better, and introducing them to our loving God. It’s hard work, but it’s the only work on earth that truly matters.

Dear God, please forgive my complacency. It’s so easy to turn inward, to stick my head in the sand, and believe that my excuses, my fears, are valid. They are not. Your work, your race, is important. Teach me how to put on my running clothes today and get to it! Show me how to get busy loving with purpose. And thank you so much for your promise to run right along beside me the whole way.

My husband and I were planning to invite some friends over to watch the Super Bowl with us. After some discussion we realized we had three different people named Kim on our invitation list. How funny would it be if only the Kims showed up, we laughed.

While the Kims on our list all have the same name, they are all very different people. One is tall, athletic, out-going, and of Thai descent. Another is more soft-spoken, motherly, and blond. The third Kim is a small, confident whirlwind of a woman who laughs easily and often.

Although these women are clearly different, because of their names, they still may be mistaken for one another, perhaps when patients are being called from the waiting room by name. Or when offered a snack at a Super Bowl party. Want some more chips, Kim?

Names aren’t the only ways to confuse two people. Some people think that everyone has an unrelated look-alike somewhere in the world. Maybe several. The Germans even have a word that has come to be used for this: doppelgänger. There are over 8 billion people on earth and a finite set of genes that determine facial features, so it is possible for an exact duplicate of a person to exist. Very unlikely but possible.

But an exact copy isn’t necessary for a look-alike. Small differences are easily ignored by our brains when it comes to recognizing people. We see similarities all over. Just yesterday I played tennis against a woman who looked just like my sister-in-law with her sunglasses on. Once she removed them, the illusion was lost however.

Famous people inevitably have impersonators that bear uncanny resemblances. Charlie Chaplin supposedly entered one of his many own look-alike contests and lost.

Quite often, people tell me I look like someone else they know or that I remind them of someone or ask if we’ve met before. I guess I have a frequently used face.

“There is no one holy like the  Lord. There is no one besides you! And there is no rock like our God.” (1 Samuel‬ ‭2‬:‭2,‬ ‭CSB)‬‬

There aren’t many totally unique things in this world. But God is unique. One of a kind. There is no other being that looks like Him, acts like Him, can do the things He does, and know the things He knows. No one else created everything and existed before it was all created.

God is the Great I AM because there is no way to describe Him other than existing. You can’t describe Him by comparing Him to something else. Like when we eat snake meat and say it tastes like chicken. Or when we smell a flower and say it smells like lilac mixed with lavender. We can only describe aspects of Him in that way, saying He is a rock because of His reliable consistency. Or He is a shepherd because of His care and protection of His people. But to describe all of who God is by comparison isn’t possible. It will be woefully incomplete.

Dear God, I worship you as the one true God, Creator, Designer, and Architect of the universe and everything in it. What a wonder! Such great variety you created and yet only you are truly different, totally unique. You are holy, wise, beautiful, good, generous, gracious, merciful, almighty, mysterious, unchanging, and made of love. And that’s not the half of it.

We humans like to feel smart. We like to be right. In fact we enjoy feeling like we are right so much that we will forsake our own growth, safety, health, finances, relationships, even our own lives, just to feel correct and validated. This is called confirmation bias. It’s a cognitive tendency to only listen to, seek out, and give credence to information that supports what you already believe.

And it’s a dangerous tendency.

In businesses it can lead to poor decision-making when hiring, investing, and strategic planning. In relationships, it can lead to misinterpretations, prejudices, hatred, and war. In schools, it can lead to uneven opportunities and loss of great potential. Among other things.

“Teach me to do your will, for you are my God. May your gracious Spirit lead me on level ground.” (Psalms‬ ‭143‬:‭10,‬ ‭CSB)‬‬

Confirmation bias is not what God wants for His people. He wants teachable children. Followers who are humble and hungry for the truth, whatever it may be. He wants me to listen to Him and be ready — no, eager — to change the way I think and act, every day. He commands me to repent of my wrong thinking and turn towards love.

God loves all people. If I’m not acting in love, believing loving things, seeking ways to love, I am not on God’s level path. And it’s time to turn around and do some relearning.

Dear God, thank you for being ready and willing to teach me. Show me how to be ready and willing to learn. Every day. All the time. Forgive me for being so sure that I am right. Teach me what is good and what your will is for this moment and the next. Turn me right around when I am headed the wrong way. I want to be teachable today.

I grew up in a place without a lot of light pollution. At night on the back country roads, the stars were bright enough, even without the moon, that you could see the fields and hills as you drove past. I was occasionally tempted to try turning my headlights off to get the full effect. I don’t recommend that.

On a clear night, the human eye can detect about 6,000 stars, a tiny fraction of what’s out there. Astronomers estimate there to be around 200 billion trillion (or 200 sextillion) stars like our sun in the observable universe. There are over 100 billion in our galaxy alone. And who knows how many are beyond what we can observe?

God knows. He created all of them. There is a buried reference to this in Genesis (1:16) that says God created two great lights, the sun and the moon, “as well as the stars.”

There are more stars out there in the vastness of space than we can count, or even see. There are more stars than there are grains of sand on our planet. Yet, all this creation power is one tiny side note in the creation story. Because He created so much more!

“When I observe your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars, which you set in place, what is a human being that you remember him, a son of man that you look after him?” (Psalms‬ ‭8‬:‭3‬-‭4‬, ‭CSB‬‬)

God created all those unknowable stars, but He also created every molecule that exists. He created everything that molecules are made of and whatever is in the spaces between them. He created the hairs on my head and the skin cells of my body that flake off and become dust.

God created every wondrous thing, most of which I will never know about.

The most incredible part of all of this is that He considers people to be His masterpiece. The crown jewel of His creation. He created us in His image. He loves us and knows us. Each of us.

Amidst all of the vastness of His creation, He knows who I am. And He wants to have a relationship with me. He wants to hear about my day. He wants me to seek Him and share with Him and listen to Him and sing to Him. What an incredible thing! The God and Creator of the universe knows and cares about me.

Dear God, I am amazed that you consider me at all. I am insignificant in the face of all you have created. And yet you value me so highly that you provided a way for me to spend eternity with you through Jesus’s sacrifice. I praise you today for who you are, for all you have done, and for this great promise of yours: to be with me to the ends of the earth. I gratefully and humbly accept your truth.

I’m trying to learn a new language, Spanish. I studied French in school and spoke fluently when I lived in Paris for a while. But for some reason, learning Spanish has proven to be a real challenge. Not because of the language. It’s all about my commitment.

I’ve been trying to learn Spanish for years and years without success. I bought software decades ago but never stuck with the lesson plan. I bought CDs to listen to in my car but found it boring and distracting. I contemplated taking classes, but wasn’t sure if the cost was worth it.

I know learning Spanish would be very helpful. I vacationed frequently in Spanish-speaking countries. I have many Spanish-speaking friends and acquaintances. I hear Spanish so often and long to be able to understand and participate. And yet, in my heart, my motivation fell flat.

Finally one day, my good friend told me about an app she was using to learn Spanish. She said she was really learning and making good progress. She offered to be my partner in my learning journey, to help me stay accountable.

I accepted her offer, and for the first time, yo puedo hablar y entender español, al menos un poco.

Inside the app, my friend can see how many lessons I have completed and how much progress I’ve made. She can also see if I haven’t done any lessons for a few days. She will ask me about it to see how valid my excuse is. And if it’s flimsy, she reminds me why I want to learn and how valuable it will be for me to continue.

“I pray that your participation in the faith may become effective through knowing every good thing that is in us for the glory of Christ.” (Philemon‬ ‭1‬:‭6,‬ ‭CSB‬‬)

Faith in Jesus is similar to any other kind of commitment.

I was claiming a desire to learn Spanish but getting nowhere due to my half-hearted efforts.

In the same way, if I say I believe in Jesus and His saving grace, but never put in any time or effort to deepen that relationship, is it really true? Do I really believe? My faith will be flat and ineffective.

When learning a language, studies say I must practice every day, at least 15 minutes a day, and more is better. I have to concentrate on the words and sentences I read and hear in the exercises and say them out loud. I won’t make progress unless I put my all into it and follow the suggestions.

With my faith, going through the motions won’t get me anywhere. If I go to church but think about what I’m going to have for lunch during the sermon, I won’t grow. If I read a Bible verse but don’t concentrate on its meaning and how it applies to my life, I have gained nothing. If I pray rote words that do not come from my heart, even God will be bored. And if I try to do my faith alone, the challenge to give up is a constant struggle. Like with my Spanish learning, having a partner with shared goals makes all the difference.

To grow closer to God, to know Him and understand His will for my life, to experience His blessings and joy fully, to be an effective witness of His love, I have to commit. I have to put my money where my mouth is, as the (odd) saying goes.

Dear God, please help me to increase my faith in you and become effective in my life of serving you and loving people. Show me the places where I am being half-hearted in my efforts and teach me how to change. Give me fellow believers to encourage me so that I can in turn encourage others.

We had a big earthquake a few nights ago that was the strongest I’ve ever felt. I was at home making dinner when my husband, my dog, and I heard the roar, and then felt the rumbling. The house shook, the ground lurched, and the walls creaked. My dog cowered, and my husband and I looked at each other wide-eyed. But after only a few seconds it was over. As far as we can tell, our home was undamaged, but I was literally shook up.

I consider myself a home-body. That means I love being at home. It is my safe place and refuge. I go out and do things and interact with people, but I always look forward to coming back home. I travel all over the world and enjoy all I see and do, but still, I can’t wait to get home again. My house, with my family and with my stuff, is where I feel comfortable, at peace, relaxed, safe.

But this earthquake made me contemplate how safe and secure my house really is.

Nothing in this world is actually safe. Nothing is strong enough or powerful enough or dependable enough to protect me from the unknown future. No amount of money, no nest egg or retirement account, can keep me warm and safe and dry. A sudden market change or world event could wipe it all away.

No building is strong enough, no security system is impregnable, no contingent of guards is incorruptible. The future is totally unknown. Anything could happen, like a global pandemic, a governmental or economical collapse, an earth-splitting meteor. I don’t want to sound overly dramatic, but it’s true. Only God knows.

“The name of the Lord is a strong tower; the righteous run to it and are protected.” (Proverbs‬ ‭18‬:‭10,‬ ‭CSB)‬‬

There is only one thing that I can absolutely put my trust in, now and forever, no matter what: God.

He has always been and will always be here. Everywhere. And He knows the future and has all the power. Nothing escapes His attention or is out of His ability to control.

When I am out in the world, He is the one I should be seeking to “come home to.” When I am scared or happy or worried or upset or excited, I should run, not walk or saunter, to Him for comfort, protection, encouragement, joy, guidance, and love. He will always be here.

Dear God, thank you for your constant presence and promise of protection. I know you won’t prevent me from experiencing life and the consequences of my own actions, but I know you are always with me and always love me. I trust that when I run to you with humility and repentance, you will always welcome me with your strong open arms.

Yesterday I went on a bicycle ride with my husband. We were trying out a new bike path. It was a lovely day, the birds were chirping, the sun was shining, fellow cyclists were passing, saying hello with broad smiles.

But I was not enjoying any of it. I had a dark cloud over my head like an angry scribble in a cartoon. I pedaled forward grimly.

I was feeling this way because as we were preparing for the bike ride, my husband had lashed out at me over a few simple things. He had treated every comment I made and every question I asked with disdain. When I confronted him a couple of times, he acted like I was crazy for thinking his attitude was anything but reasonable.

So I sulked. And as I pedaled, many thoughts tumbled around in my head. At first I contemplated telling him that I wanted to bike on by myself. And I fantasized about telling him where to go, crudely, the next time he treated me this way. These thoughts led to others about all the times he had hurt me before and ways I could retaliate, and they felt good.

But then God gave me a vision about where this kind of “justice” would lead if I continued on this path. If my thoughts became action, they would escalate our division. And I saw clearly how simple things could easily lead to brokenness, despair, regret, and eventually divorce.

“See to it that no one repays evil for evil to anyone, but always pursue what is good for one another and for all.” (1 Thessalonians‬ ‭5‬:‭15‬, ‭CSB‬‬)

After this vision, I decided to stop my fantasies of retribution and to forgive my husband. I decided to contemplate what was good for him, and us, instead of what was good for just me. He had hurt me, yes, but perhaps I would discover the real source of his pain, the pain that made him lash out at me.

Once I’d decided to forgive him, things didn’t change immediately. I was very reluctant, but I began to make comments about the view, breaking the silence. After another mile, I was feeling a lot less scribbled. I could enjoy the sunshine, the breeze, and the birdsong.

Later I did learn that my husband had had a very difficult time preparing our bicycles for the ride. Nothing had gone smoothly as he filled the bike tires, put the bike rack on the car, and loaded the bikes on the rack. Sometimes life is frustrating like that. And apparently, when he had finished, I had seemed less than grateful. So he was in a bad mood, and he had lashed out.

Obviously better communication would have helped us avoid our situation. But if I had repaid his wrong with a wrong of my own, we would still be suffering. Where would the cycle of punishment end?

God’s ways might not always be easy, but they can always be trusted.

Dear God, thank you for showing me the ugly, destructive path I was stepping onto. Thank you for your word that teaches the right path, the good path, the wise path. Thank you for instilling your word in my heart so that it is here when I need it. Thank you for forgiving me so that I know how to forgive others.