I have an embarrassing story. It is about the one time in my adult life that I threw an actual tantrum.

My sister, her husband, and I planned to go on a cruise for the millennium new year in 1999. I’m not a big cruise person, but it seemed like a good way to be away from any craziness that was predicted to happen because of the Y2K bugs. (In case you weren’t alive during that time, some people were expecting mass infrastructure outages and Purge-level events. In the end, it was much ado about nothing.)

We’d planned this trip years in advance. I bought 2 tickets. I was single at the time but thought I’d surely have someone to come with me when the time rolled around.

It turns out I did. I met a guy from South Africa earlier that year. He came to the US, and we traveled around the states planning to end up in Puerto Rico where we’d meet up with my sister and embark on our cruise. I was very excited, but when we arrived at the cruise terminal, they said my friend couldn’t board. His South African passport was apparently a potential problem in some of the ship’s ports of call.

This is where the tantrum comes in. I stood right where all the passengers stand as they board and wept loudly. I cried and wailed. I was very disappointed after waiting years for this trip so my tears were sincere, but I’d never let go like that before.

I was a little amazed at myself because I’m usually private, reserved, and avoid being the center of attention. Not that day! I really wanted that trip. My passion overwhelmed me, and I let it.

The cruise line ended up calling a customs official to come from the airport for us. He arrived, and after a short interview, we were both allowed to board. We had a great time.

My tantrum was rewarded for a silly thing like a cruise. It makes me wonder why I don’t throw more tantrums. Why don’t I have that kind of reckless passion for important things?

“During his earthly life, Jesus offered prayers and appeals  with loud cries and tears to the one who was able to save him from death, and he was heard because of his reverence.” (Hebrews‬ ‭5‬:‭7,‬ ‭CSB)‬‬

Jesus modeled tantrum prayers. Maybe not childish ones like mine, but whole-hearted, put-it-all-out-there pleading prayers for important things. He sweat blood, He was so worked up. Jesus knew how to pray.

And He was heard because of it. God rewards tantrums when they are heart-felt and aimed at meaningful requests. Lukewarm prayers, He tends to spit out.

Dear God, thank you for hearing my prayers when they are sincere. Fill my heart with passion for the right things, things that matter to you. Move me to care as deeply for your will as I do for my own selfish desires.