I’ve never been very good at comforting anyone. When my husband gets sick, I take care of him but have to try to hide my annoyance if his extra needs drag on too long. No one should ever hire me as a nurse.

It’s really hard in general to truly comprehend the suffering of another person. Especially when you have no basis for comparison in your own life. Real empathy requires a focused imagination. And even then, it can be a struggle to figure out effective ways to help, comfort, and console.

“Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies  and the God of all comfort. He comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any kind of affliction, through the comfort we ourselves receive from God.” (‭‭2 Corinthians‬ ‭1‬:‭3‬-‭4,‬ ‭CSB)‬‬

When trouble comes to my life, my first response is to wonder why. There may be several reasons, some of which I may never know in this life. But one reason could be to help me relate to the pain of other people. Since I find it such a challenge to understand and comfort others, God may decide that I need to know firsthand what it is like. When I know, comfort comes easily.

When a friend of mine shared that she was frightened by a recent diagnosis of breast cancer, I was immediately empathetic because I had been there. We discovered that her diagnosis was almost exactly the same as mine, as was her treatment plan. I was able to calm her fears and step through the process with her. I never would have been able to be any help to my friend if I hadn’t already gone through that fear and suffering myself.

God loves for His children to provide comfort to others. Some of us are so thick-headed that the only way we can accomplish this is through first-hand experience. I am one of those that has needed lots of personal demonstrations.

Dear God, thank you for the comfort you have provided me during the times of my darkest struggles. Thank you also for using the suffering I have endured to teach me how to have understanding and compassion to help others who encounter similar troubles.