Psalm 139 is my mother’s favorite. It is so meaningful to her that she even made it part of her email address.
I love it too. It is a beautiful love poem David wrote to God. It’s a fan letter from God’s biggest fan.
But today’s verse makes me think about a relationship on the rocks. The hopeful apology at the end of a beautiful love letter. David was indeed God’s biggest fan, but he wasn’t perfect. He betrayed God’s trust on at least one glaring occasion recorded in the Bible.
Relationship experts say that when one person in a relationship betrays the other, their trust must be rebuilt from scratch. It can be a slow process. Part of that process involves complete transparency on the part of the betrayer, moving forward. For example, after a husband is caught cheating, if he wants his wife’s forgiveness, he needs to eagerly volunteer to show her every text and email he sends or receives, to hear every phone call he participates in, and to see his location on her phone at all times. (Among other things.) This kind of transparency if critical to rebuilding that broken bond of trust.
In today’s verse, David is offering this kind of transparency to God. David knows he failed God badly. But he loves God deeply and longs for the intimacy they once knew. So David offers to be thoroughly searched and tested. He is begging God to search his heart.
Of course God already knows everything about David and his heart. He didn’t need this permission. He forgave David as soon as he repented. But this beautiful offering of David’s is still very meaningful and important. And I’m sure it was a worthy and much-appreciated gift to a loving God who also wanted their intimate relationship back.
Dear God,
Thank you for the example of David. His skill and creativity at praising you is inspiring. Clearly he loved you deeply. I would love to know you the way David did. I’m afraid to be searched because I know I am so flawed. But please do search my heart and reveal to me what you disapprove of so that I can change. I want you to be glad and delight in me as your child the way you delighted in David.
CamDevo 